I’ve found it takes a lot of work and discipline to stay in the right mindset.
And even with that you can be your own worst enemy.
You might already realize that when you’re failing it’s because of a limitation somewhere, that’s stalled you out. But did you know that most limitations are ones that you’ve put on yourself, most of them without you even realizing it?
Below is a list of those subconscious things we say to ourselves that limit our success, even when we think we're positive and proactive.
1. “Someone doesn’t like me.” It seems like it doesn’t matter how many compliments a person gets, if there’s one criticism, you’re probably going to dwell on it. That one negative comment might even be holding you back from ever trying again.
2. “I do everything wrong.” This one is a fallacy right out of the gate. No one can do everything wrong. The fact that you’re here and breathing says you’re doing something right. What this is an example of is that ‘all or nothing’ thinking that looks at take one mistake or error and using that to determine that you’re not able to succeed no matter how hard to you try.
3. “Anyone could have done that.” By downplaying your role, you deny your abilities. There’s a time for modesty certainly, but when you take this too far, you start thinking you can’t do things well on your own, thereby limiting yourself.
4. “I failed last time.” In this case, you’re certain that one failure is automatically going to lead to another. This kind of overgeneralization limits you by making you think that previous experience always has to affect current performance, regardless of what you’re doing differently.
5. “I can’t do it.” By assuming you can’t before you even try, you’ve already guaranteed your failure. With this kind of brain blockage, you’re probably not going to work very hard if you do press on, because subconsciously, you’ve already determined that it’s not worth the effort.
6. “This just feels ‘off.’” By relying on our emotions to act as a barometer of our success, you’re not likely to get very far. New things aren’t going to feel right the first time you do them. Most times you’re in new territory it’s pretty normal to feel uncomfortable or like things aren’t working out right.
In understanding the messages that you send to yourself, you likewise start understanding why you have certain limitations. By paying attention to self-talk, you’re better able to push past this point into the possibility of success. It’s all a matter of listening to what you have to say.